Friday Finds

1. Gabrielle Bookcase | Zulily 
2.  Zadie Pendant |  Zulily
3. Quick Keto Meals in 30 Minutes or Less 
4. Jonathan Adler Pop Candle Champagne
5. Dark Gray & Walnut Romily Dining Chair – Set of Two
6. Roro Handcarved Mango Wood Serving Plate 
7. Gray Brisbane Platform Bed
8. I Love My Instant Pot Recipe Book 
9. 17-Inch Distressed Wood Hanging Swing Rope Floating Shelves | Amazon 

Source Link: Friday Finds

Original Source of this article: Ruth Davis’ OC Blog ,


We’re expecting! The old-fashioned way!

#TBT On Thursday’s I post from the Vault. This post is from March 2006
We are excited to announce that we are expecting! This was an unexpected surprise, and we have been nervously waiting for the past few months to confirm that we would have a viable pregnancy. We had our 12 week ultrasound today, and the baby is healthy and thriving! Obviously, we are amazed and overjoyed, and so excited for Jafta to have a sibling so close in age. We are attaching a picture of the little guy (or girl). We would certainly welcome your prayers in the coming months that we will have a healthy, full-term pregnancy. God is good!

Source Link: We’re expecting! The old-fashioned way!

Original Source of this article: Ruth Davis’ OC Blog ,


Can you be addicted to habits or behaviors? We discuss process addictions, and how we can become hooked to certain experiences, from the internet to shopping to flirting. We talk about how to know when a process addiction has gone too far, and what to do about it.
Some great books on process addictions:
We also talk about pets as self-care and chat about our own personal experiences and ambivalent around our furry friends. Looking for a new pet? We recommend pet adoption. Check out this site to find adoptable pets in your area.
In this episode we also talk about our experience with HelloFresh, a meal subscription services that delivers recipes along with all the ingredients you need in pre-measured, labeled meal kits. They’ve got gourmet meals but also many one-pot recipes for seriously speedy cooking and minimal cleanup. For $30 off your first HelloFresh order use the promo code SELFIE30.

Podcast (selfie): Play in new window | Download


Original Source of this article: Ruth Davis’ OC Blog ,

Life Lately

This movie. Wowwww. Go see it! 

Ramps they made today using the leftover construction wood laying around. 😂

There are some days where the single mom gig is felt more acutely. Today was one of those days. My morning was spent dealing with bad news after bad news and I’d cried three times by noon. Then at 3 the plumbing backed up due to roots entering my pipes and I came home from picking up the kids to find sewage flooded into all three bathrooms. I knew I needed help. So I told the kids we had to deal with it, together. It was a family challenge. They put on rain boots and plastic gloves and without complaining, helped deal with the hazmat situation in our house, laughing the whole time. There are small blessings in this hard season. One has been watching my kids rise to the occasion, over and over, in stepping up and stepping in to help. Even if it means stepping in to a dirty tub.

Romantic love is amazing. It is intoxicating and exhilarating and exciting and comforting. It is also optional. It is a lovely and life-affirming experience to be in love, but it is not the air we breathe. A reminder today to be grateful for the many kinds of love you find yourself in, but that in the absence of certain manifestations of love, you are still enough.

These are the two I chose. The special ones, the favored, the prized. Just kidding. I took Jafta because he eats a lot and Karis because she’s still kinda young and India and Kembe were happy to sit unsupervised with iPads by the gate with the promise we would sneak them cookies. I’m not above going in alone but I’m also hella cheap and not about to pass up feeding 3 of us in an airport for free. Alas no massage for me (was too worried about the clock) but I did have some very nice Pinot and a lovey leek soup.


When we travel I make the kids figure out our gate and I walk behind them while they navigate. Always pushing towards travel independence and at this point they are pros! Spending their “ski week” at Disney World and on a short Disney cruise with #disneysmmc

Source Link: Life Lately

Original Source of this article: Ruth Davis’ OC Blog ,

Wednesday’s Child: Dalton

Every Wednesday I feature a child recently highlighted by a local Wednesday’s Child newscast to share the stories of children from around the country who are waiting for a family. My hope is thatthis can broaden exposure for the children highlighted, but also serve as a reminder that these children represent thousands of children currently in the foster-care system. Perhaps their stories will inspire you to consider opening your home to a child needing a family. For more information and to learn about other waiting children, visit AdoptUsKids.

Source Link: Wednesday’s Child: Dalton

Original Source of this article: Ruth Davis’ OC Blog ,

Why I Never Called it Rape

What I Want You to Know is a series of reader submissions. It is an attempt to allow people to tell their personal stories, in the hopes of bringing greater compassion to the unique issues each of us face. If you would like to submit a story to this series, click here. Today’s guest post is by Allison who blogs over at Allio
Photo by Joanna Kosinska

I was 22, living in a foreign country, alone, a virgin. My worldview had been tiny before- I believed all people were out for my good and that nobody would purposefully harm me. We had hung out one time before- and looking back there were signs- but I was just ecstatic to have a friend. When he said he didn’t think prostitutes were that bad, my eyes widened, and that’s when I should’ve ran. But I stayed and he manipulated me to get in my room and stay the night. I had told him I was a virgin and not ready to have sex but he didn’t really care. Before I knew it, he was on top of me and I just submitted. What was I to do? Who could I call? I didn’t even know the emergency phone number of this country I was living in- nonetheless- couldn’t even speak the language to talk to the operator. I just wanted him gone and then I would figure it out. As he left that morning, I sat still with my thoughts. What had just happened? And why do I still feel attached to this guy? He let me know he didn’t want a relationship with me, so I just stalked his facebook and wondered why I wasn’t good enough. I had given him this precious gift and he didn’t care. 

A few weeks later I found myself at the doctor with my sweet friend Liz translating as my legs were up in stirrups. Yep, he had given me an STD. I told him I had to pay out of pocket for the doctor’s visit, and he didn’t even respond.
After about a month, I couldn’t take it being so alone in this country, dealing with the aftermaths of my emotions. I went home to my dad’s house and I remember the warm embrace of family. I was safe. I was home. I hadn’t had my period in 2 months, but it will be fine. I was home. I took a pregnancy test and thankfully it was negative- but I angrily messaged my perpetrator and asked him what would he have done if I was pregnant? Why did he invite himself, unprotected, into my body when I specifically asked him not to? 

Life was weird the 6 months post virginity loss. I told a few friends what had happened but never used the word rape. Just said it wasn’t a great experience. I still felt heartbroken about it all but didn’t know how to categorize it.
I found my confidence back through graduate school, traveling the world, and slowly- with distance- dating again. Whenever I met my future husband, and we started talking about marriage, I knew I had to face the demons of my past. I signed up for therapy and through months of therapy I’ve learned to retell the story to myself.

I used to look back at that night as one full of shame. I blamed myself for not picking up on the cues, and I felt immense shame for losing something that I had been taught was so valuable. I had kissed him, I was drinking, I had let him stay over- these are all things that made me blame myself for the events. For so many years, I took responsibility for the situation and because of that I told the story to myself that I was unworthy of real, pure love.
As I talk to more women, I realize this story is so many of ours. The names and places and events may vary, but the story we tell ourselves remains the same. We take on this shame, this responsibility, and we blame ourselves for events that aren’t ours to have. 

This horrible thing happened to us, yes. But that doesn’t say anything about who we are. We are still worthy of the most pure and real love. We are still allowed to live free from shame, blame, and regret. We have the ability to forgive our trespassers, not because they deserve it, but because we love ourselves enough to quit carrying around this baggage. And most of all, we are allowed to forgive ourselves for what we didn’t know, for who we used to be, and for the stories we’ve told ourselves. We are also, boldly, allowed to call it rape.

Source Link: Why I Never Called it Rape

Original Source of this article: Ruth Davis’ OC Blog ,

Best Books for Black History Month

 by Melba Pattillo Beals and Frank Morrison

Source Link: Best Books for Black History Month

Original Source of this article: Ruth Davis’ OC Blog ,

Friday Finds

1. Mid-Century Velvet Accent Living Room Chair | Eggree
2. Handmade Planters from Luna Reece Ceramics | Etsy 
3. Turkish Towel Set 6 Piece by IXIRHOME (Rose Beige)
4. Bloomingville Ceramic Bowl Set with Bamboo Lids | Amazon 
5. Multi Color Geometric Rug Dusty Pink | Amazon 
6. Acme | Alivia End Table 
7. Mkono 2 Pack Modern Pots | Amazon 
8. Ouro Black & Rose Gold Three-Piece Starter Set | Zulily 
9. Satechi Aluminum Universal Unibody Monitor Stand | Amazon 

Source Link: Friday Finds

Original Source of this article: Ruth Davis’ OC Blog ,

Odds and Ends

1. After yet another school shooting, are you ready to demand action? If so, please visit this website.

2. To my sweet, wonderful children, please don’t get murdered at school today.

3. For those of you who don’t think you can do anything in regards to gun control, you absolutely can. It’s called voting out the politicians who have the NRA in their pockets. Here are some of the biggest assholes, um, I mean offenders. (Follow the money, you guys! Always follow the money. These politicians have blood all over their hands.)

4. Proud of this student. Although ADULTS AND POLITICIANS should be protecting these children. Forget thoughts and prayers, we need policy change. Period.

5. Did you see the Obama’s official portraits? OKC was so honored to display Kehinde Wiley’s works of art last year.

6. Artists as hoarders. These works are amazing.

7. So intrigued this video by Nike Korea.

8. I’ve watched this “curling” video 50 times. So good.

9. OMG. Speaking of curling, my one and only Tim Riggins used to curl in high school.

10. Let’s ban elementary homework. I was about to joke that it’s killing our children, but actually I think it’s clear what’s killing our children in schools. #guns

11. I’m trying to get a good mix of serious and funny this week, although it’s tough. This one should prompt a laugh or two.

12. #1 question asked of me on social media. What hair products and hair tools do I use? Well, here you go. I use these three hair products. As for what styling tools I use…Hair dryer. Curling wand. Flat iron. (<- if you use those links, you can get 50% off the price of those styling tools YOU ARE VERY WELCOME. Price reflected when you check out.)

13. On this week’s Selfie podcast, we are talking friendship in your forties.


Happy weekend to you all. Give your kiddos an extra squeeze or two.

image credit: ohkii studio

The post Odds and Ends appeared first on whoorl.

Original Source of this article: Ruth Davis’ OC Blog ,